Pathetic

"C'mon! Let's go out!", Mark told me.

"Where are we going?", I replied.

"Let's go barhopping. Don't worry. I'll pay."

"I don't want to go out.", I said with a smile.

"Pablo, you've been so sad for a week now. I don't want you to be sad. Let's go out and have fun."

"No, thanks. See you tomorrow." I smiled politely.

But I was telling myself, "How can I have fun when my Nanay (mother) has been in ICU for a month now and I can't even be with her because she's miles away. I can't even call her on the phone because it might interfere with the medical apparatus? Pathetic!"

I closed the door gently but I was sad. How can friends be so pathetic? Don't they know that I am grieving right now?

As I always do everytime I am in emotional pain, I opened myBible. I turned to John 11.

John 11 is about Lazarus and his sisters Martha and Mary. In the story, Jesus learned that Lazarus died.

Lazarus' sisters, therefore, were grieving.

Jesus loved Lazarus, Martha and Mary so much. Mary was the same woman who poured an expensive perfume on Jesus' feet.

We know what happened next. Jesus wanted to visit them inspite of the danger He may encounter in going to the same place where the Jews stoned Him.

Martha was probably discouraged. She felt that her only hope,Jesus, was late in coming to help them (verse 21). I guess, though, that Martha was still hopeful as she told Jesus, "But I know that even now God will giveyou whatever you ask." (verse 22)

How did Jesus respond?

Jesus knew that Martha and Mary were grieving.

Did Jesus invite them to go to the Jordan River for aswim? No, He did not.

Did Jesus ask Martha to go shopping? No, He did not.

Funny but it is how some us console our friends.

Did He rebuke Martha and Mary for having a little faith? No,He did not.

Instead, He reassured Martha and Mary by telling them what He can do as the Son of God.

Then they went to the tomb.

What happened next?

Jesus wept (verse 35).

You might be asking, "Why did Jesus weep?"

Or you might be thinking in the same way that Jews who were there thought. You might be thinking thatJesus wept because He loved Lazarus so much. (verse 36)

Jesus' love for Lazarus is unquestionable. But was that the reason He wept. I am convinced that it was not.

Let's go back a bit to know the reason. Verse 33 says, "WhenJesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled."

I strongly believe that Jesus wept because He was feeling what Martha and Mary felt. He was actually empathizing with them.

Webster's Dictionary defined empathy as, "the action of vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another."

I have reasons to believe that the reason why Jesus wept is because He was empathizing with Mary and Martha.

I hope we can learn from Jesus when we have a friend who is suffering.

Instead of rebuking our friends;

Instead of treating our friends to McDonald's or Starbucks;

We can use the Scriptures to reassure that Jesus is still in control.

We can also relay to them that we care by empathizing with them.



"Out on the highways and byways of life,
Many are the weary and sad;
Carry the sunshine where darkness is rife,
Making the sorrowing glad.Make me a blessing,
make me a blessing today"
-from the hymn "Make Me A Blessing"