Leavin' Cambodia

I am leaving Cambodia soon.

What made me decide to leave Cambodia? Some may say that I've grown tired of living here. I really do not know.

Or let us just say that I want to give myself a break. Let me tell you a story to illustrate my dire situation here.

There was a heavy rain last week. As a consequence of that, some areas in Battambang were flooded. On my way home from school, I had to do one thing that I dreaded the most. I walked through the flooded street while imagining all the harmful bacteria that pass through my pores.

There are other horrible stories I can tell you but I think one is enough. Besides, I love Cambodia so much that I don't want to paint an awful picture of her.

Anyway, there are happy memories which I will treasure for the rest of my life. I met a lot of wonderful people who are now now part of my being.

My students who gave me wonderful time in school. They are too many to mention. I remember my students in Banteay Meanchey who climbed mountains with me. My students in BBU who are all awesome. My students in Aii in Phnom Penh who are also equally gun to be with. My students here in Battambang who taught me that there are still teenagers who are respectful and peace-loving. Thank you very much.

The ordinary people who I met everyday here in Cambodia. The store owners, the motodop drivers, the beggars which is seems innumerable. All of you gave me new perspective in life.

Indeed, Shakespeare was correct when he said, "Parting is such a sweet sorrow."

LMAO (Laughing My Ass Off)

Human relationships are very complicated. That is the very reason why psychology is not an exact science.



In my life I've been trying not to emotionally hurt others. However, I've unintentionally offended some recently. I apologized to them not because what I did was wrong. I've apologized to them because I've hurt their feelings.



I believe that all of us have to learn how to relate with others.



I am reminded of the lyrics of the song that says, "Baby... baby.. it's a wild world."



Yes, this is really a wild world.



Therefore, we also have to learn how to politely tell people to mind their "breaks". Sometimes it is needed to tell others to "stop".



I am reminded of the incident a month ago when I was told by a young lass to be careful of others. The young lass told me that I really should not easily trust people.



A person who I think is wiser reminded her that I am old enough to know what is right and what is wrong.



Part of my philosophy when it comes to relationship is that I should never, never tell others what to do unless they ask for my opinion. And even if they asked for my opinion I sometimes tell them that I can't decide for themselves. (My leaning is towards non-directive counseling.)



What I usually do is just to give others a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. Basically, I just try to help them process their feelings.



But how about others who have the habit of telling you what to do?



Let me quote my previous blog:



"Another subtype of this first group is the "Smart Aleck". They will tell you what to do and they love to brag about their opinions. What the heck! Let them believe that they know everything. Let them be like clanging cymbals though I really can't relate with them. For I have learned that the only thing I know in this life is that I know nothing." (http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=10150174304179452)



So, you may think that you are wiser than me. That's okay. That is a valid feeling.



But do you think that it is wiser to give your pieces of advice only if you were asked?



Mmm...



Just wondering.

Just Unfriended Someone

I just preached in our vesper service today.



In my preaching, I mentioned that there are people who will sap our strength. There will always be discouragers. They will come to you pretending to be friends (in a sheep's clothes). They may even pretend that they are discouraging you because they care.



I encountered that kind of person just now.



What did I do? I unfriended him on facebook. That doesn't mean that he's now my enemy. No. :-)



I unfriended him because if I won't I feel that he will just weigh me down.



I am reminded of my past note entitled "Pain-In-The-Neck".



Well, to tell you more about it allow me to share to you our exchange ot messages. Let's name him "U.P." which means "unfriended person".



Here it is:



Me:

Sorry, Doug, if I offended your sensibilities. I posted those for my friends who can understand my fears, my decisions, and my feelings.



I am sorry again.



UNFRIENDED PERSON (U.P.):



no need to apologies (sic) - i just felt that humility in these matters my be better - but I will pray for your success my friend



Me:



If you think that I am boasting when I posted that note - THEN YOU ARE WRONG!



That has never been and will never be my intention. You've seen it differently though.



Please do not respond to this. As I deleted you from my friends' list.



U.P.:



how mature and christian of you



Me:



Yes, I am a Christian. And being a Christian doesn't mean that you will accept insults. I felt insulted



First, I was accused of being humbug or boastful. And now, I am being accused of being immature.



Thank you but I know myself.



I just want to let you know that I've already forgiven you for your accusations.



I have the right to choose my friends though. Thus, I will appreciate if you will no longer respond to this.



U.P.:

wow what a shame you cannot accept any form of criticism - friends are not supposed to just agree with every thing you do or say they are there to offer advice -i am sorry if you think i insulted you - a guilty conscience maybe - anyway it is between you and God not me - i wish you well in your Christian activities



Me:



If I want to give constructive criticism, I approach that person personally without others knowing it. I make it a point that it is just between the two of us. I don't let others hear my negative but constructive criticism simply because I care for that friend. My criticism might be correct or wrong. But I will definitely not talk about it in front of people since it is something negative. Probably, I will accept it if you've said privately, like if you will send it to me as a personal message. But you criticized me in front people by posting it publicly.



What is the right way to criticize a person? I believe that the best way for a person to criticize a person is to talk to him privately.



Doug, I can accept criticism but you said it in an offending manner.



Apologies accepted.



Yes, it is really a shame if I cannot accept criticism. But I assure you, I can. It's just you said it in a wrong way. A WRONG WAY!



And, Doug, may I give you an unsolicited advice?



You are here in Asia. And we Asians are really not that upfront. I hope that you will also consider Asian cultures when dealing with Thais. I am sure you've got a lot of Thai friends who will tell you about Asian cultures.



U.P.



"knowing yourself? is that ego? Surely it is how God sees you that matters and if you see yourself differently to how others see you then so what - few of us see ourselves as others see us - God bless



Me:



I know myself. I see myself as God sees me - no more, no less.



I am loved by God, not perfect but forgiven. I am also special to Him.



I don't see myself as the way other see me. I see myself as how God sees me.



You see, men are fallen. We are all sinners. I am a sinner. If I will see myself the way other see me - I will have a distorted view of myself.



I should see myself as God sees me - love, forgiven and empowered by His Holy Spirit.

Sermon Outline: How We Can Be Worthy of God's Calling (I Corinthians 4:13)

How Can We Live Worthy of His Calling

(Ephesians: 4: 1-13)

by: Jun Gravoso



Introduction

All Christians are called. We are called to be the light and salt of this world. It is a special calling.

That means we have to live worthy of His calling.

We can live worthy of His calling:



I. By having a good attitude (verse 2)

A. with humility (verse 2a)
B. with perseverance (verse 2b)

II. By being at peace with one another (verse 3)

A. by loving others (verse 2c)
B. through the spirit (verse 3)

III. By using our spiritual gifts (verses 11-13)

A. for ministry work (verses 11-12a)
B. for edification of the church (verse 12b)



Conclusion:

It is really hard to live a Christian life if we will rely on ourselves. But with God’s help we can live a life that will show to others that our God is a living God. A God that can change the lives of people.

We also have to examine ourselves. Are we living a life worthy of His calling? A life that will also bring others to the saving power of Christ?

A Doctor's Nightmare

I feel that I am a doctor's nightmare.



First, I am now limping for reason I cannot fathom. In fact, I was crawling when I went to the toilet the other night. I've seen three doctors and they all have different diagnoses. The first doctor said I had a gout. The second doctor said that it is simple case of wear and tear of muscles. The third doctor said that it is because of my weight. He said that I am overweight and my feet cannot support my weight.



Second, I am half-blind now probably because of cataract. My students often notice it when I read in front of the class.



Third, I am a diabetic.



My colleagues, perhaps, are wondering why it seems that I am not bothered by my health. And yes, it is true that I am not bothered by it.



Definitely not primarily because I've learned to accept my situation.



I am not bothered by my health simply because it reminds me that I am human. It reminds me that I should really depend on God.



I thank Him because this is an opportunity to exercise my faith.



As the song says, "I don't know what the future holds." I don't know if I will be crawling to go to university tomorrow.



I know, though, that God will not forsake me (Hebrews 13:5). I also know that if I ask anything according to His will He hears me; and that if He hears me I know that my request will be granted." (I John 5:14-15 Right now, I am asking that God allows me to go to my class regularly.



I am also not bothered by my health now because I always look at the future. My God promised me a glorious future in heaven. In fact, He reserved a place for me in heaven. (John 14:2)



What I am experiencing now is temporal pain. In heaven, there is no pain. There is no sufferings. In heaven, I will no longer need to drink my maintenance drug to regulate my blood sugar.



And I am anxiously awaiting for that day.



"I don't know about tomorrow,

I just live from day to day.

I don't borrow from it's sunshine,

For it's skies may turn to gray.

I don't worry o'er the future,

For I know what Jesus said,

And today I'll walk beside Him,

For He knows what is ahead."

- from the hymn of "I Know Who Holds Tomorrow"

Taong Grasa

Ewan ko ba? I wish I can do more! Sana mas marami pa akong magawa para sa mga taong hindi pinapansin ng lipunan. Biro mo naman, kanina habang nakasakay ako sa jeep papuntang Jaro ay may nakita akong "taong grasa". Dumugo na naman ang puso ko. Tinanong ko, bakit ganoon? Bakit may mga taong grasa na palaboy-laboy lang sa kalye? At bakit parang bale-wala lang sa mga tao? Walang pumapansin sa kanya? Hindi ba nila naiisip na tao din siya at bilang kapwa-tao ay dapat nilang isipin ang kalagayan ng iba? Siguro, kagaya ko rin silang hopeless. Siguro, kagaya ko rin silang nanghinawa na dahil parang walang nangyayari sa pagtulong. Parang sayang lang ang lahat ng ginagawa sa buhay. Pero hindi dapat ganito ang attitude. Dapat ay hopeful tayo. Kaya nating mabago ang mundo. Iyan ang dapat nating isipin.

Noon, kapag may nakikita akong ganoon ay bumababa ako ng jeep at inaabutan ko ng biskuwit. Pero ngayon ay hindi na. Ewan ko ba. I searched myself at nalaman ko na para bang desperate na rin ako at sa tingin ko ay wala ring mangyayari sa pagtulong. Sa tingin ko kasi ay parang walang gumagawa. O kung meron man ay kakaunti.

Isa na lang talaga ang pag-asa. Ang pagdating ni Kristo. Sana dumating na si Kristo. Pagdating ni Kristo ay wala nang sakit. Wala nang paghihirap. Wala nang prublema.

Sana.

Sana.

Sana.

Domestic Violence in Christian Homes

A friend and I discussed domestic violence in Christian homes. That discussion triggered my action to write about domestic violence in christian homes.

The one that you will be able to read now is not the final paper since I desire to develop this thesis everyday maybe for a month.

The questions that will be answered here are:

1. What does the Bible say about violence at home?

2. Should the battered wife just allow the batterer to inflict pain on her in view of Galatians 5:23-24?

3. What should be the response of the church if her member is a victim of the proponent of violence at home? Should we just advise the victim to accept pain because the Bible teaches full submission to husband?

I’ve been reading the Bible and trying to know what it says about violence at home. I am also doing some research about it.

But here is my initial stand about it:

1. We should look at Galatians 5:23-23 in the light of the "whole" Scripture.

2. Our body is the temple of God. Therefore, we should not allow others to destroy our body.

3. Obeying doesn’t mean agreeing. We may disagree with the batterer and yet follow the Bible.

4. Up to what extent should the wife obey the husband? Is it absolute? (this is the most common argument)

5. The Bible also teaches that we should obey the government. The Family Code of the Republic of the Philippines says that domestic violence is a crime.

More about this next time!